Document: draft-ietf-ips-iscsi-slp-08
Reviewer: Kent Crispin
Date: May 13, 2004

Summary:  I'm not competent to make a judgement about the technical 
merits of these drafts.

I do have a few very minor editorial nits in
draft-ietf-ips-iscsi-slp-08.txt:

    Section 4.1, p6: "Each target, would have two service URLs."

    Superfluous comma.


    Section 4.1.1-2, p8 -- use of "auth-xxxx".  I presume this is 
    a shorthand for "auth-name or auth-addr", but it isn't clear.

    Section 4.1.2, the heading: "Supporting Access by Multiple 
    Identities to the Same Target" was a bit confusing to me.  I think 
    what was meant was "Supporting Access to Targets with Multiple 
    Identities", or maybe "Supporting Access via Multiple Identities 
    to the Same Target".

    Top of page 9: "In these networks, an initiator may, instead, or 
    in addition to its DA configuration..."

    should be

    "In these networks, and initiator may, instead of, or in addition 
    to, its DA configuration..."

Also, I notice that there is no "Internationalization Considerations" 
section in the iSCSI draft, while there is one in the FCIP draft.